Exclusive: Meet The "Pansexual" 13-Year-Old Girl That An Amateur Trans Musician Ideologically Groomed On YouTube
UK mum speaks out about daughter's agonising 4-year-long gender grooming journey
A few weeks ago, a mother contacted me via social media after I posted on the subject of transgenderism. She told me that her daughter had undergone an excruciating journey regarding her “gender identity”. Days later, we had a chat on the phone where she divulged the details.
Understandably, she wanted to remain anonymous, given the degree of backlash that gender-critical commentators are often subject to. So I’ve used pseudonyms - Sandra, for the mother, and Sarah, for the daughter.
Project Stark is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
In 2016, 13-year-old Sarah, bursting with youthful curiosity, began exploring the vast virtual world of YouTube. Little did she know it would shake the foundations of her life for years to come. She stumbled upon a channel run by teen influencer Noah Finnce, a biological girl a few years her senior (estimated 2 or 3 years). After watching a few videos, Sarah became mesmerised with the content.
Noah’s YouTube channel started off as an amateur music channel where she would post covers of popular songs. But in 2017, that all changed. Suddenly, after posting a video on 8th September, entitled “COMING OUT AS TRANSGENDER”, her channel morphed into a documentary-style, gender transitioning blog. Instead of watching renditions of Declan McKenna’s Brazil, Sarah started consuming videos about “chest-binding” (how to hide breasts), transgender fertility preservation egg freezing, and puberty blockers (testosterone therapy).
A running theme in Finnces’ output back then, and still today, was the belief that “trans guys” and “cis guys” (heterosexual biological men) are no different. Any effort to distinguish between the two is a form of “transphobia”. Finnces juxtaposed this with tales of her resilience to trans “haters”. She persistently portrayed herself as a brave dissenter battling against a discriminatory orthodoxy. An example she gave was people telling her she is not a biological boy.
Months later, Sarah, 13, began identifying as “bi-sexual”, then “pan-sexual”, and even adopted the name “Noah” in homage to her newfound idol. She adorned her bedroom walls with pride flags, transformed her makeup palettes, changed clothes, and adopted new “he/him” pronouns. Sandra’s teenage daughter was no longer her teenage daughter.
Some of her family were justifiably sceptical. Sarah’s father, both confused and concerned, questioned her transformation, which tragically led to the breakdown of their relationship.
Weeks later, Sandra noticed Sarah, now “Noah”, was acting uneasy when they were out at an event. After some careful prodding, Sarah confessed she really needed the toilet but was anxious about using the men’s bathroom instead of the women’s. She had to use the bathroom that corresponded to her new gender. Sandra soon discovered that she was so het up about the issue that she would starve herself of fluids for hours, if not an entire day, to avoid going to the bathroom. When that failed, she would hold her urine in for as long as possible.
The situation became even more curious when Sandra found Sarah wasn’t the only child affected by Finnce’s content. During a YUNGBLUD concert that Sandra and Sarah attended in Birmingham, she met another parent whose daughter experienced a near identical transformation. Like Sarah, after watching Finnce for a few months, she started using new pronouns, completely altered her wardrobe, considered pathways to trans surgery and adopted the name “Noah”.
Sandra and Sarah then went to another concert in Glasgow with friends. She met yet another “Noah”. The same group would go to a “meet and greet” in London, featuring various young trans and “non-binary” influencers. These events acted as a forum for the young teenagers to discuss and revel in their new identities.
By 14, Sarah was so committed she decided she wanted to change schools. She needed to start afresh, a place where she would not be shackled to her “former” self. Sandra, albeit apprehensive, fearing the same rebuke Sarah’s father had been subject to, obliged and found her a new school.
In 2018, Sandra drove her daughter, now dressed in male attire, to the front gates of that new school. The teachers welcomed her warmly. Sandra reported that the school did not question then 14-year-old Sarah’s identity. There was total affirmation among the staff, along with gender neutral toilets and pride flags. The school even hosted an LGBTQ+ support group to ensure their “trans” students felt included. This involved holding weekly meetings in which they provided information on medical treatments. However, as soon as the last bell of that fateful first day rang, Sarah emerged broken. She ran to her mother’s car, crying hysterically, her hands covering her eyes to hide the tears, as she told her mother it was all one giant mistake. Sarah said it was awful being a boy, and that she did not want to be one anymore.
Struggling to find a new direction, Sandra tried homeschooling. But with the challenges that posed and the lack of help from the school she had enrolled Sarah in, it proved too difficult.
By 2020, Sandra wondered if there might be an underlying mental health condition that was affecting her daughter. At 16, the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHs) assessed Sarah via Zoom. The diagnosis revealed that she was “neurodivergent”. Neurodivergent is a psychological condition, which is defined as “people whose brains develop or work differently for some reason”. They later clarified Sarah was autistic. When Sandra inquired if there was a correlation between autism and transgenderism, the CAMH clinicians told her no. This is despite the scientific literature confirming that there is.
By 2021, Sarah, now 17, made the choice to fully revert to her biological identity. She dropped her pronouns, returned to traditional “girly girl” attire, and enrolled in college. And with that, she fell in love with a biological male of a similar age also attending the college. Now, three years into a relationship, the past remains a closed chapter, a testament to a time of pain and regret.
Sandra isn’t allowed to ask any questions about the ordeal. If she does, she’s met with a sharp frown or deafening silence. Fortunately, her relationship with her father has recovered.
Finnces, meanwhile, continues to pump out transgender content. She is now nearing 1 million followers. Some of her latest videos include:
Recent 2022 data shows that the number of British children seeking gender treatment via the NHS has risen by two-thirds in less than two years. About 8,000 under-18s are currently on waiting lists, a 67 percent jump.
Just last week, 20-year-old Isabelle Ayala initiated a lawsuit against a group of doctors in the U.S. for ignoring her autism and prescribing puberty blockers after just two consultations when she was just 14. She is now left in daily pain, including vaginal dryness, burning and itching. Something that usually occurs only after menopause. Isabelle is also unsure about her ability to have children.
In February, reports alleged that more than 1,000 British children were likewise rushed onto puberty blockers at The Gender Identity Development Service (GIDS) at Tavistock and Portman NHS Trust in London. Many of these children were handed life-altering drugs after just one assessment. Former clinicians of the trust expressed “regret”, particularly as some were under 16-years-old.
Online trans content, too, “convinced” Ayala of her “trans identity”. Her story serves as a tragic example of all that can go wrong when a young impressionable kid imitates their trans idol in an environment where activist-clinicians simply affirm gender identity rather than investigating it.
For Sarah, it was a lucky escape.
To help this story reach others who might have experienced similar ideological grooming online or in the classroom, please share. We need your help in building a grassroots community for parents and students to report incidences like this anonymously or otherwise.
We have a self-report form on our website for those who want to tell their story.
Project Stark is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support the work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.